Six ways to sit still (one of them is the washing up)

People new to meditation often think it is a way of escaping from real life for a while. Done properly it works the other way. You end up noticing more of your life, and a good deal of what you were afraid of turns out to be smaller in daylight.

There are many kinds of meditation and none of them is the quick one. What they share is the aim: to be here, in this minute, without a running commentary about the last one or the next. When the mind goes quiet there is suddenly a lot of room in it.

The trick is to find the kind you feel at home with. Here are six. If one of them makes you think "I could do that", start there.

1. Nothing. Sit and think of nothing at all. It sounds like the easy one and it is the hardest. Thoughts will arrive. Let each one go without picking it up to look at it.
2. One thing. Give a wandering mind a single job: a word you repeat, a candle, your own breath going in and out. The Buddha said that being mindful of breathing is the key.
3. All day long. No sitting required. You stay with whatever is happening while it happens: this cup of tea, this walk, this conversation. Simple to describe and surprisingly hard to do for more than a minute.
4. One question. Hold a single question in your mind and keep coming back to it. Many people find that the mind settles and an answer turns up on its own. Some people call this prayer. You do not have to.
5. Moving. Yoga and tai chi are the famous ones. Gardening counts. So does ironing, and so does washing the dishes. Any slow, repeated task will quiet the mind without your having to try, which is why some of your best thinking happens at the sink.
6. A helping hand. My favourite for anyone starting out, and for anyone who is sure they have no willpower. Somebody talks you through it. You follow the voice and the thoughts take care of themselves.

If you are not sure, start with number six

Sitting alone in silence is a lot to ask of a beginner. Being led is easier, and nobody is marking you.

I guide a meditation every week on Sunday Mornings, which is free. Or sit with number two for seven minutes tomorrow, counting your breaths from one to ten. You will lose count. Everybody does. Go back to one.

That going back is the practice. The people who look calm on their cushions are doing exactly the same thing. They have just been going back to one for longer.

From the archive. First written for my journal years ago, and rewritten for life after 50.